Just about EVERYfriggingbody (and yes, so am I, right now, I know) posts New Year’s related articles, listicles, memes, and status updates about being a better version of themselves for the coming year. New Year’s Day and birthdays are always a natural time to take stock of oneself and life and even plot a new course or two to keep moving down that path toward whatever it is you prefer to think of as your personal destination. Money, sex, love of another, self-love, wisdom, kittens… people offer and seek out spiritual guidance continually over the week or so surrounding the calendar change. The market is saturated.
And that’s the rub. Anytime a market is saturated, that means it’s probably flooded with shitty product. Clickbaiters and mememongers come out in droves to entice you into clicking and liking their brand of resolution porn, and ultimately you’re just being used to drive traffic to their site – REAL TALK – Elephant Journal doesn’t give a FUCK about YOU.
So what’s the point? Here. Have a shitty list:
1.) You’re awesome. You’re doing just fine. If you’re still alive and breathing and surrounded by people that love you, then YOU ARE GOLD. If you don’t feel like you are, then talk to somebody. If you don’t feel like you have anybody, you actually do, look harder, you’ll find them. They’re probably seeing you hurting and hoping you’ll reach out.
2.)You’re beautiful the way you are. I’m 37. I don’t work out. I don’t eat as well as I could. Etc. I have a little spare tire around my waist and it gives me nearly daily anxiety because of some stupid self conscious body issues I developed at some point in my life. When I actually stop my evil brain for a second and listen to the people around me, though, I hear that I’m good enough, and the outside stuff doesn’t matter. At all. Don’t resolve to change yourself because the little hater in your brain tells you you’re fat or ugly. Fuck the little hater.
3.) People don’t change. I’m serious. I think it’s a disrespectful self-loathing thing that we do to convince ourselves we need to change, because it’s impossible. We are who we are. We LEARN more, and GROW as people. But we are who we were when we were shitty to that person we love. We are who we were when we were abused. We are each a beautiful compendium of love and life and don’t turn your back on your gorgeous self.
My resolution-that-just-so-happens-to-come-at new-year’s is to turn off all the noise and listen to ME and people who love me.